I HAD TO POST SOMETHING!

Alright, I had to post something but I couldn't think of anything to post, so here you go :) This is something I wrote a while ago, two days before Josh died.

"Clouds, and I can't see any more beauty.

It's a nice cold ten degrees and the concrete is red and wet beneath my feet, the grass springing from a drought stricken ground, the sky a blazing blue, the clouds fluffy and carefree, leaves green and gold and red, moving into autumn now, and I have never seen anything so beautiful as this.

Beauty, in the eye of the beholder; the beholder, me, the beauty, my own backyard on a frosty Monday morning, Dad in America and Mum off doing the shopping. Dog, running around, thundering paws, cold air whistling through her nose, braking, chasing birds, birds that fly - I wish I could run like that, run and run and RUN and never get tired and never look back 'cause maybe that'd mean I could fight forever as well.

Birds, wings, feathers, tiny parachutes, song, so beautiful. I can't whistle, but I have ears, I can hear the music, joy to be alive, so beautiful, tiny little hearts, tiny little ribs, a little cafe of life and energy. Take the time, appreciate, I love the sun, I love the cold, I love the way the rocks poke my feet 'cause it reminds me I'm real, love the way my dog barks because she wants me to throw the ball, love how she sits on my feet and rubs her head against my hips and is so warm. She is alive. I am alive. right now, I am the only person with my dog whom I love so very much, and I can imagine that it will be alright. So long as I am aline, it will be alright.

I breathe air he will never taste again, I see colours, explosive, details, so miniscule, so important, everything made of cells, beauty and pain all in one and why have I never realised how beautiful it all is before, why haven't I noticed there is more to life than life?"

So comment please :) I don't usually write like that or leave it feeling so raw and untamed at the end, but when I wrote this I needed to feel. I needed to get it down before I forget everything I had realised in that two hours I stood out there.

COPYRIGHT! NEED I SAY IT?! COPY THIS, AND I'LL SUE! Lol :P

the sensational crusader. (: