Friday, September 24, 2010

Back again :)

Ok ok ok.I'm sorry :P

Latest news: I'm now seventeen! It means $13 hourly on weeknights and $15.90 on Saturday mornings. (That's good money. The minimum wage for under 18's in Australia is 9.90 an hour. I really love my bosses sometimes)

I don't feel any different somehow. :S

A lot has changed since the last time I blogged. Mostly I've just realised that it's been about six months since Josh died and yet the world hasn't stopped turning. When he took his final breath the world and its residents didn't stop and pay silent vigil; life went on.

I can't say for anybody else, whether they've realised this, and thanks Bleah Briann because I probably wouldn't have without you - but no matter how bad it hurt at times and how much I wanted to close my eyes and never wake up my heart kept beating and my eyes opened every single morning, whether I wanted them to or not.

So now I've realised that somewhere along the line, there had to be divine intervention. I'll never understand why Josh had to die and why all the rest of us got to live, when he deserved life more. I'll never understand how people could still so easily forget somebody so incredibly loved. But what I hope I'll always understand is that I can't possibly understand because it's not up to me.

On another note, I'm watching the X-Files. Go figure. That show always creeped me out.

So basically here it's our spring holidays. After this, I go back to school for five weeks. I have my psych exam week 2 of term and the rest from November 15th to November 19th. And then, after that, this little thing I call summer.

Hot winds, dead grass, pools and ice cream. For three months. I hope it gives me time to figure things out before year twelve. I can't believe I'm in almost in year twelve. In a year's time I'll be two weeks away from my finals, and three weeks away from having my future decided based on one score.

I better start doing better in math.

-a solitary blue